In Dedication to Our Great Mother- Khadija (May Allah Be Please with her)

The first person to embrace Islam, When the message came she was level-headed and calm,
She was a comfort and a guide,
As she stood firmly by the Prophet’s (PBUH) side.

A businesswoman of the highest calibre,
Her example shows us women can be clever,
She handled affairs with wisdom and ease,
This amazing mother of the believers was a model of strength, a perfect breeze.

Her strength was known to all,
In times of hardship she stood tall,
Her wisdom was so clear,
To the prophet (PBUH) she was very dear.

She recognized his good character,
And soon sent representatives to sort out the matter,
Their marriage was a perfect example for us all,
Their love and support made them stronger than a brick wall.

Oh Khadija! Our blessed and beloved mother,
You surely had a different kind of power,
It was not used to dominate,
Only love and warmth did it generate.

There’s so much that we need to learn from you,
Our model of beauty and all that is true,
You had no need to change the roles,
A power struggle there was none of, even though you were so bold.

Your life will always be an example for us,
A true depiction, with no worry or fuss,
The perfect Muslim woman,
Striving and pleasing for the sake of Allah!

In these times when females fight to get ahead,
When the battle of power is so evident,
Your story shines through and teaches so much,
And we understand what true female strength is all about.

Your example is our shining light,
There’s no need for us to emulate,
All the fake role models they want us to follow,
Who we know will only bring us sorrow!

With the help of our Creator,
We will use your life as our shelter,
The lessons we learn from you will protect us,
Our beloved, our mother, we remember you fondly!
May Allah unite us in Paradise!

Image from: ericyang.wordpress.com/.../22/finding-the-light/

Aren’t you feeling hot in those clothes?

It’s a hot summers day and I’m dressed in my long cloak and headscarf, happily minding my own business, walking in the shopping mall, and then suddenly someone comes up to me and says; “Aren’t you feeling hot in those clothes!” Okay then! So I’m actually wondering what I have to do with them at all and why they’re coming up to me asking ridiculous and irrelevant questions, and would they like it if I went up to them and asked them something stupid about the way they’re dressed, I mean really, what if I went up to someone dressed skimpily and asked them; “Aren’t you feeling naked in those clothes?” They would wonder what’s wrong with me right, and they would probably give me some story about how they’re free to dress how they want to and how their clothes have nothing to do with me. So, how come they think they have a right to come to me and ask me about how I’m dressed? Nevertheless, I look at them, and smile, because deep down I know the truth about how good my dressing makes me feel, and I say, “no, I am not getting hot”, as politely as I can, because I actually have no need to be defensive and I know that if I respond in a negative way then this will just give them fuel to go on about how Muslim women are sad and oppressed, forced to wear long, hot clothes, even in the boiling heat.

Now, if they had actually really bothered to hear my side of the story before rushing off, then I would be able to tell them that actually I am the one better off, because when someone is covered, they are less exposed to the UV- rays from the sun, which we know could be very harmful. Also, I would be able to explain to them that because my clothing is lose fitting and not tight, my body actually does not keep the heat in and create more heat, and thus I am much cooler. Then finally I would be able to urge them to try dressing the way I do, just for a short while, so that they can experience what it feels like themselves and then next time they won’t have to ask questions that will be regarded as stupid. My sister likes to say that she would really like to say to the next person who asks that question that; “the hellfire is far hotter than I will ever feel in these clothes”. The opportunity has not yet arisen for her to do this yet, or for me to really explain things the way they really are.

Of course, we hardly ever get a chance to explain all this to people, because they look at us, make their comment, or ask their question without really truly wanting an answer and then they’re off again, without even bothering to take the time to understand. Why do they do this? I’m not completely sure, but I do know that if they had actually understood things better, they would not be making such statements or asking such questions.

Then there’s the point that’s far more important than even all the above ‘explanations’. All this seems futile and weak in relation to what it really means to dress in the manner Muslim women do.

You see, they’ve lost the true meaning of things, because dressing in a certain manner is not just about the physical. And since this is all that it has been reduced to, it’s no wonder people end up asking questions like this. Would anyone go up to a nun for instance and ask her if she is getting hot in her clothes which by the way very closely resembles that of a Muslim woman’s dress. People will most probably not do this, because it’s taken for granted that her dress is for spiritual and religious reasons. So why can’t they understand the same thing about Muslim women?

Our dress is not about whether we’re getting too hot, or whether it’s stifling or even whether it’s covering our beauty (many people make the comment that God made you beautiful, so why should you hide it). The way we dress is about submission to the will of our Creator, it is about our faith! When people realize that it has nothing to do with the physical and everything to do with the spiritual then they will understand that even if we are getting hot, or even if we did find our clothes uncomfortable, it makes us happy to think that our discomfort is a sacrifice that will please our Lord.

So whether we get hot or cold, whether we feel comfortable or uncomfortable, whether we love the clothes we wear or hate it, all this really should not matter at all, because IT IS NOT ABOUT THE CLOTHES AT ALL!

Once people realize this, then they will begin to open up their minds and understand, and perhaps then Muslim women won’t have to deal with people’s ridiculous questions and even more ridiculous comments. I don’t know what you think, but I have to admit that hearing people make such silly comments actually makes for good laughs, and of course it gives people like me something to write about!

Image from: www.clipartof.com/details/clipart/20876.html

Women and Friendship

A cluster of women stood outside the school excitedly discussing their little children. They seemed to be enjoying their discussion as they laughed at all the cute and adorable things their kids do. The others listened attentively as one of the ladies relayed her stories. Their voices were animated and full of joy. I could not help observing this scene as I waited outside the school for my niece to come out. It was clear that these women received support and encouragement from each other. As regular mothers coming to pick their children up every day, they had bonded and formed friendships that seemed genuine and warm. Judging from what I saw it seemed as if these women looked forward to these few minutes each day where they could share their common experiences with other women who knew exactly what they were going through.

I went inside the school and observed something very similar going on with the young girls. Groups of girls walked together, holding hands, laughing and chatting. “And this is exactly the way it is with women”, I smiled as this thought passed through my mind.

It made me realize that women need to have friendships with other women. We need to share our experiences, vent to each other, express our happiness and of course our frustrations. That’s the way women were made it seems, at least most women. While men might look on and wonder why women need to have bonds with people outside of their families, or how they can share their personal experiences with others, women understand that this need is innate. As emotional creatures women get comforted by the idea of having others to share things with. The need to talk about things is something that men may never understand, for them it seems unnecessary and futile, but for women, talking and sharing is the thing that bonds them, it’s what builds friendships and strengthens their relationships.

Now, I’m quite aware of the flipside, and I cannot deny that many times this talking and sharing is exactly what causes trouble for many women, but like many things in life, friendship is something that can either be constructive or destructive, depending on your situation and the type of friends that you have. Some women will argue that men have easier relationships; that they can make friends as easily as they can lose friends and that they do not get caught up in dramatic displays of emotion. This is undeniable, but, the friendships that women have with each other is sometimes the only thing that helps them make sense out of their lives. Understanding that there are other women out there, who share your feelings and who can relate to whatever situation you are presently in may well be the sunshine on the cloudy day.

In the end, even though there may be arguing and bickering, little irritations, or even jealousy and animosity, despite all this though, one thing is for sure, women will never deny that they need to have their friends!
Image from:blog.thoughtpick.com/.../2009/10/friendship.jpg

Beauties and The Beast

Last year some time an esteemed international speaker was giving a talk at one of the local Masjid’s in Johannesburg. A friend of mine was given the task of welcoming the ladies who were attending and directing them to where they were supposed to go to listen to the talk. She asked me and another friend to join her as she stood at the entrance of the Masjid, waiting to greet the ladies.

This was a very interesting experience, never before had I seen so many Muslim women wearing niqab (the full face covering) coming together in one place. As the ladies approached, they all greeted and embraced us and then moved on to find a place to sit. It was not the fact that so many Muslim women in Johannesburg actually wear the niqab that struck me, but the fact that all these women were beautifully dressed, and even more beautifully made up with stunning colours of eye-make up to lipstick and sweet smelling perfumes.
 Now, there’s a misunderstanding that Muslim women are not allowed to make themselves look beautiful, but in actual fact this is allowed, just within limits. If a Muslim woman is only associating with and meeting other women then this is allowed, and obviously, this beauty is encouraged within a marital relationship where a woman should beautify herself for her husband.
 As we took our shoes off to enter the Masjid, I looked at my plain black, flat shoes- in relation to all the Cinderella like slippers I saw around me, my shoes looked sad and ugly. There were pencil heels and pointed shoes, sandals with glitter, shoes with flowers and even some with crystals.
 The ladies wore stunning abayas in many different styles and shapes, with fancy sleeves and shiny fabric. Their headscarves were immaculate and tied beautifully as it elevated their natural beauty. Now, I am not going to go on about the description of my sisters because this is not a very good thing either and it might provoke more curiosity about what a woman looks like underneath her veil.

I will tell you this though, I thought about myself; a regular old plain Jane, and I could not help feeling very much like the beast amongst all these beauties!

I guess you never can judge a book by its cover, and just because a Muslim woman covers herself completely, it does not mean that she has given up her femininity or her ability to look beautiful, because one thing is for sure, these women who were completely covered, took more care of themselves and beautified themselves more than many of us ever do, and all of this was within the confines of Islamic law!

So, the next time you look at a woman who is fully covered, perhaps you will remember that she probably knows more about beauty and fashion than you do and I sure do hope that you won’t be inclined to feel sorry for her, and hopefully you won’t remain stuck on the idea that she is not allowed to be beautiful, or that her face covering means an end to her femininity, and finally I think that it would be great if you could look beyond her veil and realize that she is a human being, a woman who has feelings and needs like all women do, and maybe, just maybe you will begin to understand that there is more to her than what she wears on the outside. I don’t know about you, but I can safely say, that day at the Masjid will remain a clear reminder to me, if ever I was to forget this!

Image from: www.calla-salon.co.uk/stock_makeup.jpg

Profile- A South African Muslim Woman -Political Activist

'She fought a good fight'
March 13 2010 at 09:16AM Get IOL on your
mobile at m.iol.co.za


By Fiona Gounden and Carvin Goldstone


Political activist Fatima Meer has died, aged 81.

Family and friends were distraught last night at the news of the death of the freedom-struggle stalwart at Durban's St Augustine's Hospital after suffering another stroke yesterday.

Meer, who lived in Burnwood Road, Sydenham, is survived by her daughters, Shamim and Shenaaz, and five grandchildren.

Her son, Rashid, died in a car accident in 1995 and her husband Ismail died in 2000.

Her funeral will be held at her home between 9am and 12 noon today and thereafter there will be a memorial service at the Durban Exhibition Centre between 1pm and 3pm.

Shamim Meer yesterday said that they were conducting prayers at the mosque and the family really missed her.

Meer was the founder member of the Institute for Black Research and her close friend of 25 years, Ramesh Bharuthram, who is the vice-chairman, said she was a woman of substance.

"I knew her for a long time and she was an amazing woman with lots of energy."

eThekwini deputy mayor Logie Naidoo said: "She will be recorded in South African history as a stalwart who championed the cause."

The chairman of the 1860 Legacy Foundation and president of the South African Hindu Maha Sabha, Ashwin Trikamjee, added: "Even after the struggle, Meer continued with her fight for liberation and the rights of the oppressed. Her fearlessness is a quality that I will never forget."

Transport Minister Sbu Ndebele said: "It is a terrible loss but she can rest knowing she fought a good fight.

"Because of her intellect she was a formidable opponent of apartheid. A personal friend of Nelson Mandela, she kept the fires burning in the dark days."

Movie mogul Anant Singh said from New York last night: "Fatima Meer was one of the most exceptional women that I have ever met.

"We have been blessed to have had her in our lives.

"She was a shining light in the liberation movement, a defender of women's rights and a champion of the less advantaged people of our country. She was a woman of integrity and dignity.

TAKEN FROM: http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=6&art_id=vn20100313075416200C663665#more

Read more about this:
http://www.thepost.co.za/
http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=6&art_id=vn20100314071606427C473455#more
http://www.timeslive.co.za/local/article354045.ece