The good feeling of meeting old friends

Last week as I was coming out of the bank I was greeted by an old friend. We used to work together a few years ago. She was waving to me excitedly from across the road. We hadn’t seen each other in a while and so even though we were short of time we stood there speaking, animatedly catching up on recent happenings. As we stood there and spoke, another old friend, who also used to work with us at the same time, suddenly came up to us, she was on her way to the bank as well. We stood there for a few minutes, the three of us chatting and laughing as we spoke.

In a few short minutes we had managed to speak about our most recent happenings, how we’ve been doing, how our families were doing and we even managed to get in some discussion about Muslim women and their contributions to society. After our short break from reality we all walked away to continue with our tedious chores for the day, but we were smiling and we felt quite good.

That’s the way it is with old friends, especially friends who have so much in common with you. You may not see them in years, and when you do you can pick up as if you just saw them yesterday. I believe this is a blessing and mercy from Allah Almighty as well. Allah puts people in our lives, and bonds are created, and for a moment in our lives we spend every day with those people, and then it’s time to move on, but even though we see much less of those friends thereafter, the bonds that were created still continues on, and the good times you’ve spent together will never be forgotten.

This is because each encounter we have with different people contributes to making us who we are today. So in actual fact, we are all linked to one another eternally; sometimes in small ways, and sometimes in big ways. Some things I will never forget from the people I’ve associated with over the years. For instance, one of these friends I met last week is responsible for teaching me how to wrap my headscarf in the way I still wear it now. Other things are more subtle, and we may not even realize how we have being influenced. Even though things may not always be great between us and the people we mix with (we all have our good and bad moments), in the end, the effects that people have had on us cannot be denied. We cannot meet and associate with people and remain unchanged, and this is one of the beautiful things about life. Subhanallah!

So last week my friends and I went in our own directions and we probably won’t see each other for a while again, but it certainly was good to have met my two friends again.

Image taken from: http://thecassignolwriters.blogspot.com/

Patience is definitely a virtue

Have you ever being driving behind a really slow car, or worse, a really slow truck. So you become irritated and decide to change lanes, but as soon as you change to the next lane, the slow car in front turns to go somewhere and the lane that you were in then becomes the faster lane, and you’re thinking; “stupid, I should’ve just stayed where I was and had a little patience”. This happened to me again this morning. It’s happened before, and each time I tell myself, “next time I’m just going to have patience and take it easy”, but next time I still find that I am not patient enough, and I am not a speed freak or anything, I just really don’t like being late for appointments and thus I lose my patience. In any case, this morning I really began to think about life and patience.

You often hear that “PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE”, but I guess this has become one of those clichéd things that we tend to ignore because we’ve heard it so many times. But seriously, when you really consider these words, you’ll find that it is absolutely true and I think the thing that makes patience the biggest virtue is that it’s something that is not always easy to practise. When I think about things, it seems that most problems in life wouldn’t be a problem at all if we just had patience. All our worries would be non-existent if we just patiently waited to see what Allah (SWT) has planned for our lives.

Allah Almighty repeatedly tells us in the Holy Quraan that through patience and prayer we will be successful, and Allah loves it when we are patient! So how come patience is something so difficult to maintain? I think it’s because we’ve become accustomed to having things our way and getting everything we want when we want it, without having to wait. Everything is so easy for us, Alhamdullillah; but we don't realise that we are in the “instant gratification” age. We don’t know how to wait for things. If we want to buy something we can do that easily, most of us don’t have to save up for ages to buy simple things, like our parents had to do. Of course there’s this interesting thing called “CREDIT”, that’s contributed to this, so it has become easy to get out the credit cards if you don’t have enough cash. (Let me just add here that I am totally against the entire system of credit and of course all the interest money that accompanies it).

Nevertheless, this instant gratification doesn’t only apply to things we buy, it applies to other aspects of our lives as well, and because of this we expect things to happen in our lives immediately and when they don’t, we don’t know how to handle it effectively.

This applies to our duaas (prayers) as well. We know that we should ask Allah (SWT) for things, but then after a short while if it seems that we are not getting what we asked for then we may begin to wonder why our prayers are not being answered. If we were to remain patient then we would see that surely Allah (SWT) has listened to us and accepted our prayers, the results are just going to happen on its own time.

I am guilty of being impatient on many occasions and I have to keep reminding myself of the extreme importance of having patience. It also seems that when we’re supposed to be the most patient, that’s when patience is the hardest to practise. Someone once told me that when you think you can’t be any more patient, that’s when patience actually really begins! Shoo, it seems really daunting doesn’t it, but I really think that this is one of the major keys to living a happy life. There are many examples in my own life that has shown me this, I’m sure that you can find many examples in your life too.

So I guess the next time I’m driving behind a really slow car or truck I should just sit there, take it easy and enjoy the ride, even if it is really, really slow.

Image from: http://theballerinaproject.blogspot.com/ 

Very Important Lessons-Part 3- The Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him) and the Sunnah

This is the final post about the important lessons I learnt in a recent meeting with a local Moulana.

This post is about our relationship with the Beloved Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). Moulana posed a very important question to us. He asked us what the reason is that we go to Madinah... We thought that this was obvious at first, but then we began to fumble a bit because knowing this Moulana, the fact that he was asking us this meant that he had an answer that was not so obvious.

Well, we all began to say things like, 'we go there to greet the Prophet (PBUH)', or 'we go there because the Prophet (PBUH) is there', or 'that’s a sunnah because the Prophet (PBUH) went to Makkah from Madinah'... Moulana sat and listened to us silently, as we continued to blurt out what we thought were obvious reasons. Then when we could no longer come up with anything else, he calmly said, ‘well there’s two reasons that we should go to Madinah’.

1.       To fulfil the right of the Prophet (PBUH)

2.       To thank Allah (SWT) for having sent Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) onto this earth.

Naturally Moulana explained this a little bit more. For the first one he explained it as follows: Imagine if a mother and daughter have a fight, and the daughter goes to see the mother thereafter, to greet the mother, because even though they’ve had a fight, the daughter knows that it’s the mother’s right that she goes to greet. So she goes, and while she’s there she realizes how much pain she’s put her mother in. This will soften her heart and remind her that she should be pleasing her mother and not displeasing her. This will make her want to do whatever the mother wants, right?

So, likewise, when we go to see the Prophet (PBUH) because it’s his right that we go and greet him, when we’re standing there in front of the Beloved Prophet, we should reflect on how much pain we may be causing him by abandoning his sunnah (teachings and way of life), and when we do this, it should make us want to change. We should then make the intention to change our lives and start following the way of the Prophet (PBUH). Thus, our hearts should be softened and we should repent to Allah.

Since our love for the Prophet (PBUH) is supposed to be more than even our own parents, imagine how much distress we should feel when we realize that we may be causing pain for the Prophet (PBUH) because of our actions. We are his Ummah, so if we do not act accordingly, then this is a cause of distress.

Can you see how this Moulana always makes us think about things in a meaningful way, even though we think it’s so simple and obvious? What I like is that what he has to say always makes us reflect on our own lives, even though this self-reflection is difficult, it’s necessary. Every time I self-reflect I am forced to focus on how much I don’t know and all the things that I should be doing, but am not currently doing.  It’s very scary, but Alhamdullillah, it helps to give me perspective and through Allah’s mercy each time it helps me to do a little bit more.

The second reason for going to Madinah, to thank Allah (SWT) for sending the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) is something that we all know about a bit more. Allah (SWT) sent the Prophet (PBUH) as a mercy to all humanity so we should be thankful for this all the time because we will never fully be able to comprehend just how much of a mercy the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) is.

Since hearing about these 2 specific intentions, I really wish that I could be invited by Allah Almighty to go to Madinah again. If this was to happen then Insha’Allah I would be able to make these 2 intentions and hopefully earn the pleasure of Allah (SWT) and also bring my life more towards the sunnah. If I never get to go to Madinah again then it is also okay, because as the Moulana explained to us, Allah might be more pleased with someone who prays a million miles away if their intention is corrected, and that person who may never get to go to Madinah may be closer and more beloved to the Prophet (PBUH) than the one standing right in front of him in Madinah. So Alhamdullillah, wherever we are we can still strive to perfect our intentions and bring our lives towards Allah and the Messenger (PBUH).

May the Almighty Allah be with us all and help us to bring our lives more towards the beautiful Sunnah of our beautiful Prophet Muhammad (PBUH), Insha'Allah Ameen!

Image from: http://www.weblo.com/property/city/al-Madinah/405969/

Very important lessons- Part 2- On Knowledge

So as I promised, I will now tell you about the other important lesson I learnt from our meeting with the Moulana I mentioned in my previous post.

This lesson is about knowledge. The Moulana related a story to us. He said that Imam Shafi (rahmatullah) went to Imam Malik (rahmatullah) for some advice. Imam Malik told Imam Shafi that knowledge (ilm) should be like salt and Practise (‘Amal) should be like the dough. What this means is that there’s no point of having tons of knowledge if you’re not going to put any of it into practice.

I really agreed with what the Moulana was saying. He went on to say that these days it seems that people have bags and bags of salt but no dough. He explained this to us further to make a point (you know Moulana’s like using analogies) so he said, imagine you’re having a wedding, and the first thing you go out and do is buy ten packets of salt. Before you even get the rice to cook the food, you go and buy the salt. What if you don’t find rice when you want to cook the food? What will you do with the salt then? Would there be any point in having the salt? He then asked us to consider how much salt is needed when making dough. When looking at the proportion between 'dough' and 'salt', it was clear how much more we should be focused on putting things into practise.

Shoo, these questions were so simple, yet so thought provoking, so profound, and so, so relevant. I thought about all the books I have and whether I’ve managed to actually put into practise the things that I’ve read from these books. I couldn’t help but wonder if my quest to gain knowledge would lead to me practising what I have learnt or if it would be of little use. It also made me think about something else...

It’s true that people in today’s times have a lot of knowledge, about many different things. It’s never being so easy to acquire knowledge, and yet I had to agree with the Moulana that not much of this knowledge is being put into practise. When I thought about this more deeply I realised that this is because knowledge in today’s times is very closely connected to ego. Many people feel good about themselves when they have knowledge. It’s become a status symbol to have knowledge. If you have the Masters degree or PhD then suddenly you’re respected and your word means something because after all you are “knowledgeable” and the Degree behind your name testifies to this. So yes, most definitely there is an abundance of knowledge, but how much of this knowledge is beneficial is another story.

I have always being someone who values knowledge. I just like learning new things, and I’ve always enjoyed reading and researching different things. My only wish is that this does not become a form of pride and egotism. I know now that if I have ten packets of salt, but no dough, then the salt I have becomes totally useless. I pray that I can be someone who can put what I have learnt into practise. Insha’Allah!

I’m sure that this has made you think about knowledge in a different light, I know that I, for one, have begun to think about it differently, and since I’ve heard Moulana speak about this, I just can’t help noticing how many bags of salt there is and how little dough.

Would't be great if we all (myself included here) began to use the salt we have to make some more dough!

May Allah (SWT) give us all beneficial knowledge, which will be a means for us to gain His Pleasure, and may Allah Almighty give us all the ability to share and practise the knowledge that we have.

Let us remember that the best way to share is through our example!

Image taken from: http://imechanica.org/node/2319

Very Important Lessons- Part 1- Repentance

I’m part of a community Muslim women’s group. I think I mentioned this before in a previous post. We conduct various workshops with ladies, hoping to somehow assist them to live more positive lives and to have more positive relationships (Insha’Allah Allah will accept our efforts). For our own self growth we decided to meet on a regular basis with one of the Moulana’s (spiritual teachers) at the Masjid where we run our workshops. The aim is to gain whatever wisdom and guidance we can to improve our own lives, because if we are not concerned about improving ourselves, then how can we assist others to improve themselves.

For me these meetings are always profound, even though the messages are so simple. Perhaps it’s because of our intention for going there, or maybe the way in which the Moulana gives us the time to think and reflect, I’m not sure. In any case, what I’ve learnt from our last meeting left such an impact on me that I thought I’d share it with you all.

The first thing I learnt was that the answer to any difficulty is to make taubah (repent for one’s sins). Although we always hear this, there was just something in the way the Moulana spoke that really made the point. He explained to us how one day the doors of repentance will be closed and then the entire mankind will be deprived of Allah’s mercy. He reminded us that this day may be soon. He urged us to make taubah because this is the key to help with any difficulty. This made me reflect and think. How often do I truly make taubah? You know really beg for forgiveness from the bottom of my heart, sit on my prayer mat and cry because of guilt for my sins, that type of taubah. Okay so maybe I recite istighfaar on my tasbeeh (prayer beads), but is this really taubah? I felt guilty, I still feel guilty while I’m typing this. My self-reflection made me aware that I definitely don’t make taubah often enough. This is something that I have to remedy.

Another thing the Moulana brought to our attention is that when we commit sins, our Imaan drops to a lower level. He recited a verse from the Holy Quraan and explained it to us. He told us that Allah (SWT) tells us that in order to bring our Imaan back to its former level, we need to make taubah. He also emphasised that the best time to make taubah is Tahajjud time, because this is when Allah (SWT) sends His mercy down to us.

Since that day I’ve been trying to make taubah more often, sometimes it’s difficult and I feel rushed for time, but I know that this is something that I have to commit myself to, because I most definitely do not want to be deprived of Allah’s mercy and start repenting when it’s far too late.

The strange thing is that the more I make taubah, the more I’m reminded of Allah Almighty’s Mercy. I remember hearing in another lecture that Allah (SWT) loves it when we repent and if we did not commit sin then Allah would have created another nation who would be able to repent for their sins, because Allah Almighty, The Most Merciful wants to shower His Mercy and Blessings on us. SubhanAllah, Allah truly is Amazing!

May Allah (SWT) accept all of our repentance and help us to receive His mercy and forgiveness, Insha’Allah Ameen!


There are other important lessons that I learnt from our meeting, but I will put that in my next posts Insha’Allah.

Image from: http://webspace.webring.com/people/vm/mutmainaa/tafakkur/reflect.html